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How to Attract a Chinese Man Part 1: A Cartoon You is a Sexier You

Posted: 05/5/2014 7:31 pm

how to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beautyHey, expat ladies: does being single in China suck? Are you tired of being an amazing catch that no fisherman is interested in? Take our Nanfang China Insider Sex Tips for the easy way to make yourself more appealing to the Chinese man!

As the prominence of social media continues to grow, so too will your appearance online. For you to properly send out the right signals, you’ll need to look your best in order to compete with the many pictures of last night’s dinner on Weixin.

We are all for being fabulous and free as a single woman in your thirties, but it remains that Chinese men are fickle with their choices. Don’t wind up being a leftover!

Entire lives and websites are devoted to fashion styles, clothes and make-up in China, but for this installment of Nanfang China Insider Sex Tips we’re going to focus on one thing: how to have an aesthetically-pleasing online appearance by Chinese standards.

If you thought posing like an alluring Chinese girl was as easy as flashing the peace sign, well sorry, girlfriend—you just Dewey Decimaled yourself a place back up on the shelf. It’s high time your avatar got a makeover.

Taking a headshot and digitally adding stars and rainbows is so pre-millennial. Nowadays, all the hippest Chinese girls are going back to the drawing board—literally.

Chinese women are taking pictures of their faces and accomplishing what make-up and plastic surgery can never do: becoming the paragon of pulchritude that is a cartoon character:how to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beauty

Finally, ladies—we can look our best without tramping around in high heels all night. Apply the Chinese aesthetic to your own face: flatten your face, enlarge your eyes, and make your skin into smooth, creamy porcelain. And get rid of that nose while you’re at to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beauty

Animization isn’t just about making your character portrait into a cartoon profile, Another popular method is to enhance reality into the idyllic dream it ought to be:how to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beautyhow to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beauty

If the Chinese man of your dreams has been obsessing over a two-dimensional fictional character, why let that stop you? If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!

Here’s a picture of fine, young Chinese woman. She’s very pretty, and that wink is a nice touch:

how to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beauty

However, by online standards in the ever-competitive world of social media, that isn’t enough. Ladies, you’ll need to bring your A-game to the table, and by “A” we mean “Anime”:how to attract a chinese man animization photoshop cartoon drawing beauty

Animization—it’s even better than the real thing.

If fumbling with phone apps of a foreign language or bugging your creepy co-worker to sketch you up isn’t a job in the cards, well don’t fret, you can still get of picture of the “ideal you” that has been waiting to transcend from its boring reality equivalent.

With so many people using smart phones to take “selfies”, it’s high time that a camera was specifically made for this purpose. And that’s what the Casio EX-ZR1000 is: a camera that is designed to be held at arm’s length and pointed at your own face. This camera has a screen that swivels out to allow us to take proper pictures of ourselves without needing to stand in front of the bathroom mirror.

And to help us ladies out, the Casio EX-ZR1000 is equipped with a number of built-in features that allow us to skip the hassle of Photoshop and other programs (Math and sciences—yuck! Am I right, ladies?) A special feature of this camera is a make-up filter that lightens the skin and softens the tone of everyone in its field of view—in up to twelve separate increasing increments!makeup filter casio ex zr1000makeup filter casio ex zr1000makeup filter casio ex zr1000

We’re not sure if increasing the size of the filter will make your smile bigger, or in fact makes you truly happier.

(No word as to what will happen when a user with beautiful dark skin uses this filter, but then this problem likely has solved itself by not being on sale in places that aren’t in Asia.)

Chinese culture has its own standards of beauty, and while there isn’t much you can do to change your physical features, there is a lot you can do to change the way your physical features appear.

Ladies, it’s time for you to be fabulous and become the sexy cartoon character you’ve spent your entire career trying to overcome.

Photos: Weibo (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7), Youtube screencap


Rejected by Woman, Zhongshan Man Stabs Himself in the Woods

Posted: 04/29/2014 8:00 am

We’ve heard tragic stories of spurned men turning to violence after being rejected by the object of their affections. One recent case is a 16 year-old American girl stabbed to death after turning down an invitation to a prom date. However, one 27 year-old man from Zhongshan, Guangdong instead turned the knife on himself after being rejected.

Ah Qiang recently met a woman online 15 years his elder and soon after began his mad pursuit. After being turned down by the woman because of their age difference, Ah Qiang threatened to kill himself over the phone in a desolate part of the woods nearby Tang Gan Village in Sanxiang, where he demanded the woman meet him, Nandu reported on April 28.

Frightened by the threat, the woman called the local police. But when the police arrived at the scene, Ah Qiang refused to come out despite efforts to appease him. Shortly after, a shriek was heard as Ah Qiang had stabbed himself in the stomach with a knife by the time police rushed in.

His dreams cut short, the budding Romeo was sent to a local hospital where he’s recovering.

Who knows how else this tragedy could have turned out. Seeing as they were in the woods, Ah Qiang could have escalated this to another level. But to really know for sure, you’d have to axe him.

Home page photo: Shenzhen Media Group


Married man uses nude photo to blackmail 14 year-old Guangdong girl into bed

Posted: 04/30/2013 7:00 am

A 14 year-old girl who sent a topless picture of herself to a stranger on QQ was blackmailed into having sex with the man she sent it to twice. After he attempted to blackmail her a third time, she contacted the police and he is now on trial, Southern Metropolis Daily reports.

A Po (alias) is a 26 year-old driver who has a wife and son. He met the 14 year-old Xiao Fang on QQ in early November last year. Both live in Zengcheng. Without meeting in person, A Po gained Xiao Fang’s trust.

After a while, A Po asked to see Xiao Fang’s nude body and she sent a topless photo of herself.

They met at Xiao Fang’s house on December 20 (presumably her parents were away. The paper doesn’t say) and hugged in the living room. A Po then dragged a reluctant Xiao Fang into the bedroom. When Xiao Fang resisted, he reminded her that he had her nude photo and would put it on Sina Weibo.

After they had sex, A Po took out his phone and deleted the photo in front of her. On January 3, he contacted her again and told her he still had the photo on his computer and would put it on Sina Weibo if she didn’t have sex with him again. She reluctantly obliged.

He contacted her again in mid-January and told Xiao Fang that if she didn’t have sex with him again, he would print the photo and stick it on the front entrance of her school. Scared, she consulted a QQ group to ask for help and one of the adults in the group called the police. The adult then accompanied her to the police station to tell her story.

A Po is now facing trial for blackmail but will not be tried for pedophilia as the age of consent in China is just 14.

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